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Managing Anger in others
Manage the Anger of others while avoiding infection.

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Manage the Anger of others while avoiding infection.

By: William LaakkonenAngry Looking Hot Coals


Guatama Buddha taught:

Holding onto anger is like grasping onto a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else. You are the one who gets burned.



At the workplace it seems there are all sorts of ways you can get dumped on- whether you’re the boss or the employee who answers the phone. Most of the dumping of anger is exactly like someone throwing a hot coal at you- but it’s your choice to catch it or let it fall by the wayside. When you next get a call or otherwise need to deal with an angry person- consider your responses carefully. Responding back in the same angry way simply means you caught their anger- and you are now infected. If you don’t take possession of the anger, you can’t get burned. While it is possible to avoid getting infected, it’s near impossible to avoid being affected by the anger of others.

How should you respond to anger then?

One of the best responses could be to acknowledge the person’s anger, cushioning the response with a question. “I understand you’re upset because I did not think your opinion was valid on that point- what should we do about it?”, or “I feel you’re angry with me because I didn’t agree with you, where do we go from here?”  You should note that both are open ended questions- not simple yes or no questions. These types of open ended questions can help you start a dialogue to hopefully diffuse the person’s anger and work towards resolving whatever caused the angry condition in the first place. Another thing to remember when dealing with angry people is to give up your defense- no matter what you say to someone in a rage- you are the source of their anger, he or she believes you are the guilty party, and ignores any argument you may make. Calmly let them rant and rage until they run out of steam- and they will. Do avoid the temptation to interject or respond- it will only extend the delay. When the person is quiet and talked out, ask him or her in a calm tone of voice if you may now proceed to solve the issue at hand. Be courteous, the results can be amazing.


You can learn more anger management techniques by attending an Anger Management Class. Anger Management Classes help not only those who harbor anger, but also those who must deal with angry people.

 

Manage the Anger of others while avoiding infection.

 

By: William Laakkonen

 

Guatama Buddha taught: “Holding onto anger is like grasping onto a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else. You are the one who gets burned.”

 

At the workplace it seems there are all sorts of ways you can get dumped on- whether you’re the boss or the employee who answers the phone. Most of the dumping of anger is exactly like someone throwing a hot coal at you- but it’s your choice to catch it or let it fall by the wayside. When you next get a call or otherwise need to deal with an angry person- consider your responses carefully. Responding back in the same angry way simply means you caught their anger- and you are now infected. If you don’t take possession of the anger, you can’t get burned. While it is possible to avoid getting infected, it’s near impossible to avoid being affected by the anger of others.

 

How should you respond to anger then? One of the best responses could be to acknowledge the person’s anger, cushioning the response with a question. “I understand you’re upset because I did not think your opinion was valid on that point- what should we do about it?”, or “I feel you’re angry with me because I didn’t agree with you, where do we go from here?”  You should note that both are open ended questions- not simple yes or no questions. These types of open ended questions can help you start a dialogue to hopefully diffuse the person’s anger and work towards resolving whatever caused the angry condition in the first place. Another thing to remember when dealing with angry people is to give up your defense- no matter what you say to someone in a rage- you are the source of their anger, he or she believes you are the guilty party, and ignores any argument you may make. Calmly let them rant and rage until they run out of steam- and they will. Do avoid the temptation to interject or respond- it will only extend the delay. When the person is quiet and talked out, ask him or her in a calm tone of voice if you may now proceed to solve the issue at hand. Be courteous, the results can be amazing.

 

You can learn more anger management techniques by attending an Anger Management Class. Anger Management Classes help not only those who harbor anger, but also those who must deal with angry people.